Change of address!

Thank you all so much for your patients and prayers over the last several weeks. I have been a little slow in returning phone calls, emails and keeping up on my writing. I always say, "I have my plans and God has His." His plans are always better since He promises us a hope and a future; just sometimes, it is hard to remember that in the middle of a struggle and trial.

What started out as a summer visit just three weeks ago quickly turned into a change of address for my mother, sooner then expected. Plans were that she would visit us for a couple of months, try and sell her place in Southern CA. and then start the process of moving in with us, slowly and leisurely in our timing.

After being here only a few days she asked if we could talk. I am learning to break the habit of defaulting to negative thinking but I did go there and thought "oh, is she already tired of us and has changed her mind about the move?" However, it was just the opposite of that.

My mother is a C.O.P.D. patient with Emphysema and on oxygen 24/7, I believe that information will help you better understand how all of this played out over the last several weeks. Therefore, as I sat with my mom on the front porch, thinking the worst, she actually told me she thought it would be best if she made the move permanent now. OK, I was a little surprised and had to laugh at myself for even letting my negative thoughts pass through the stop sign of my mental traffic controller.

That happened on May 26, just three days after she had arrived. Her breathing had become difficult and she was having trouble with energy and feeling not so well. We as a family were happy to go from future planning to now, we could see that my mom needed care and we are in a season to be able to help her. My mom and I went from worrying about making the move happen to it just happening. It was sudden and so simple and really put our priorities into perspective on what really matters most.

For the next week, she continued to struggle with her breathing and just could not get enough sleep. She was looking tired and weak and I was becoming fearful of not being able to care for her if something really were to happen. Then on Wed. night two weeks ago, during the most incredible lighting storm we have seen in the Sacramento area in years, I had to rush her to the E.R. on doctor’s orders. Thank God, for my husband, his discernment and wisdom to take over where I just could not. He stepped in and said we needed to get her to the doctors, no more waiting.

On June 4 at 1:00AM, they admitted my mother into the hospital for a 5-day stay, she was diagnosed with pneumonia and for a patient with lung disease it could be fatal. She had tremendous care through it all and the blessing in disguise was that she was informed about her disease and how she could learn to function with it. We found out the C.O.P.D. and Emphysema was not a death sentence and that there are things she could do to help her function better in everyday life. This forced her to also find a primary care Doctor immediately and was open to the doors of pulmonary rehab, something she had never been offered.

I spent most of my days and evenings with her, mostly just being by her side. This is a new town for her, a new hospital and doctors she had never met. She arrived in such a frail state, I had a hard time leaving her every evening but I would hold her hands and pray for her before I said my goodbyes and my goodnights. Everyday I saw her gain a little bit more strength back and come to life a little bit more. By the time she was released, it was as if I was taking a new person home, it has truly been a miracle to watch.

She has now been home over a week and yesterday she started working out to build up her muscles in her lungs to help her breath better. Today she even reminded me about working out. Yesterday she was a little more tired then usual but I had to remind her that she moved around a lot all by herself yesterday. Things she normally asks us to do she was doing all on her own. That has been so cool to watch!

I believe the greatest miracle here is not necessarily in the physical but rather the mental and to see her with such a positive attitude towards herself and her life. She has been an encouragement to me as well as an inspiration. Thank you all once again for your continued prayers and for reaching out and checking up on us. I will be posting pictures really soon. Have a great rest of your week.

"Running my race in a lane called grace"

Cris

Sow a thought, reap an action.

Sow an action, reap a habit.

Sow a habit, reap a character.

Sow a character, reap a destiny.
- John Stott

"You are right, I am wrong, please forgive me."

A gentle answer turns away wrath.
Proverbs 15:4

Sometimes my own self-righteousness, arrogance and pride get in the way that not even a log, but a whole forest could be protruding from the sockets of my eyes and all I could see is what looks like shadows of other peoples short comings. When in reality what I am actually witnessing is my own sin being played out, right before my eyes.

I was driving home from my weekly grocery shopping trip, which, because I was on top of things I was a day early, ahead of my to do list. I was feeling really good, really proud of the fact that I was ahead. I had both my son and my daughter with me. They were talking to me but I really couldn't’t hear what they were saying because I was in my own little world of pride, having a little mental party for myself and my accomplishment.

I approached the first stop sign and stopped out of habit, not because I was paying much attention. As I stopped, the car to my left made what I believed to be an incredibly sharp left hand turn. It was so sharp the I was convinced that he was going to take us out with one swipe of his bumper, so as I have done so many other times before, I became the local traffic controller. I placed both palms on top of the horn and pressed down as hard as I could. In my mind I thought “that will teach him a lesson”.

As I drove away I noticed that he made a u turn and started to follow me. Normally this would have made me nervous but I just started praying. It was dark outside but I still sensed a peace deep with in me. As I prayed for protection I heard the Lord speak to my heart and it was the craziest thing. What He was saying was “pull over”, I thought ya right, pull over, no way. But I have learned to be obedient because I love my heavenly Father and trust Him more then myself.

As I started to pull over He continued to talk to my heart, He said “prepare yourself to seek forgiveness, you were wrong, you were over the white line”. Quickly I went back to the stop sign in my mind and sure enough I could see myself sticking over the line, almost begging to be hit. This was the last thing I wanted to do, my kids were in the backseat watching this all play out. My pride told me that if I asked for forgiveness to this person that my children would interrupt that as me being weak, instead of fighting for their safety but I knew the truth, I knew what I needed to do.

As this person pulled up next to me, I noticed that he was a man in him mid 30’s. He rolled down his window, pointed his finger at me and in a raised voice not yelling just raised he said, “you were at fault”. All I could do was look him in the eyes, I realized I had accused him of the very thing I had done and that I was putting me and my children in harms way. So, as I looked him in the eyes I just said, “You are right, I was wrong, please forgive me.” He looked at me, shook his head and just drove away.

I explained to my children exactly what took place and how I was truly wrong and that my own pride kept me from seeing my fault. I shared with them the leading of the Holy Spirit and how He was able to help identify my part and then the scripture that says “a gentle answer turns away wrath” came alive to me and I realized how life giving the Word of God truly is. What could have been a horrible confrontation ended in a life lesson that has changed me for the better, as well as my children

Today my pray for you is that you will allow God to lead you and direct you so that you may become all that He has intended you to be. God is not about shame or guilt but rather Grace and Love and His corrections are proof that He loves His children and that He has plans for us all. Even in our weakest moments we can glorify God if we choose to be obedient to His truth.

“Be still and run your race”