Smudges, smears and fingerprints!

Greetings From the Front Porch!

Have you ever had a friend speak an amazing word over your child and about your child and you thought to yourself, "They must be thinking of someone else’s kid"?


Life had caught both of us off guard, days turned into months and months into a few years. However, as we sat together it felt like old times, we folded into the moment and started sharing about some of our similar struggles over the past several years. We laughed, cried, giggled and joked about where we had been, where we where at and where we where headed. I love the way she shared how she felt like she had put all the right ingredients into the recipe, “what went wrong?” she said.


I pondered her question for a moment and the heaviness of the last few years of parenting seemed to have lifted a bit and I didn’t feel so alone. She had just put words to my feelings and I knew instantly that we were right back to where we had started so many years ago when I was navigating my way back into my life and she was there to help direct me towards the truth. The hours we spent sharing seemed like seconds and when the time had come for her to go, I knew that once again God had used her to answer my prayers.

Those prayers had been sent out just days prior to our visit in regards to a particular area I was struggling with over my 13-year-old boy. This morning however, the struggle had been lifted and a feeling of hope and peace had taken over my heart, one I have not felt for a long time.

I had not realized how dirty and dusty the lens of my life had become until I had sat with my friend yesterday and shared my heart. There were invisible smudges and finger prints all over the lens I use to look at my life and it took sitting down with someone who knew me well to help me clean off the smears, wipe of the smudges and adjust the lens that I use to parent through.

Yesterday as my girlfriend spoke over my son’s life and about his life, I realized I had a distorted point of view and that I was comparing him to others and trying to mold him into what I thought would make people around me happy. I cared to much about what others thought and not enough about his amazing character and the kind of man he is growing into. She spoke vision into my life, she challenged me to look at his future and all of a sudden, my 20/20 eyesight over my boy was back.

I realized after I could see clearly that my son had not changed, just the way I had been looking at him had. It took allowing someone else, who I trusted and respected, someone who I had history with, who had learned to walk by faith and not by sight to speak into my life and over my life.

I was able to look at my son without trying to change him or fix him and instead celebrate who he was becoming. I use to be good at doing this very thing but life happens and I am sidetracked and my lenses get blurry and I adjust to the smudges instead of cleaning them off. Note to self, clean lens daily, if needed, hourly!


She gently with her words took off my invisible glasses, with grace, mercy and compassion she wiped away the fingerprints, smudges and spots that had over taken the lens of my life, through the circumstances of just being a breathing human being. As gently as she removed them, she then placed them back on my face. Thank you my friend for cleaning off my lenses with your love. I can see clearly now!


For now from the Front Porch!



Cris