Living In My Why!

Greetings from The Front Porch!

The weeks leading up to the conference brought me to my knees, good thing He promises to show up best in my weakness. A bomb threat, news of a friend’s terminal illness, the loss of a life an almost head on collision and revolving illnesses throughout the home with my children.

These were just a few of the trials that led up to the day of the conference where I had pressed in and prepared to give my best, sharing from the place I am most passionate about, going all in and all out, no matter what the cost.

As the trials became larger and more frequent, I thought to myself, “maybe I had missed the mark; just maybe I was not suppose to be speaking at this event.” It was not that I was surprised by the frequency of the trials and the severity of the hits but I was tired of being knocked down and beat up.

At one point a phone call to one of my nearest and dearest was made or I would have quit, this conversation led to tears being shed and prayers being spoken. The very thing I needed to here was “you can do this!”


Of course, through it all I found myself living right in the middle of the message I was preparing to share, I was created to be in community, a passion and a life purpose that I live by, why? Because it is not good for man to be alone, or woman in this case?

If one falls down, they can help each other up and by the end of the preparation time, falling down seemed like the only place to go and I needed my community to help me get back up.


There is something powerful about living in the message just before delivering the message. I sit back today and I realize that the message of community was just another gentle reminder to me that God has given me an answer to a long awaited question birthed out of the process of preparing for this particular event.


As I sit back in my sanctuary, sipping on my coffee and watching my community out my front window, I pause in the moment to reflect on all the preparation work that led to the most amazing answer that came to me early this morning as I walked and talked to God.


Why is so much more important then the what. Our passions and purposes come out in our why, we motivate and sometimes intimate by the why in our life.

Example, what I did today was sat on my front porch, why I did this, to connect with my community, why, because it is not good for man to be alone. Not if but when we fall there will be someone there to help us up.


I finally figured out my WHY! I understood my what and I knew there was a why being formed but only after this past event was I finally able to articulate my passion for people and the reason why I delight in the connecting of people in community, either for a reason a season or a lifetime.


Why do I do what I do? Because it is not good for man to be alone, because, if only for a moment I could be a part of someone not being a lone, if just for a moment I could be a connection for someone to feel like they belong, that they have value and that Jesus loves them, then I will do it.


Today I choose to live in my why, embracing the who, what and where it will lead me.


“Living In the Moment”


Cris